26th,27th,28th day of waiting

26th day of waiting..Thur
we did experiment during BIO..
calories de..
kinda fun cuz can c da nuts burn..
especialy cashew nuts..
burn till very nice..
den da boiling tube whole thing oso burned till black jor..
nice~
bt no chance take pic..
den da water rly boiling..
at 100 degree celcius..
keep boiling..

den PJK..
walked with weii..
wan find sailou de..
told jor him i gt PJK dat day..
den at dewan dere look rite loo left..
nobody..
walk here n dere..
cant find..
den dey finiz recess jor..
only saw him coming out fro pameran buku..
ish~
den nvm..
go bully my "bf" n "gf"..
haha..
only weii noe~

bi oral..
my turn de..
bt i wasn't around..
so teac gav it to xh..
n i missed my turn..
DaMN..

dat day oso is carmen's bday..
haha..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY~

27th day of waiting..Fri
after recess..
dun hav class jor..
cuz all teac din come..
so 1 funny thing..
weiyang wore annie's pinafore..
damn cute..
like an apron..

den sy n i play 'baseball'..
she took out umbrella..
used it as bat..
she asked me to throw at her..
den i throwed her eraser at her..
den she hit bek..
OMG..
da eraser kena my nose..
den no play jor..
^^
den ntg much..
when going bek..
saw sailou de..
wanna chase up..
bt walked too faz..
cant catch up..
TT
anyway~
THX sooo much for da movies..
now i can watch jor..
even though dunno when i free la..
cuz kinda bz lately..
bt thx^^

den at nite..
after bath..
feeling not well..
lik wanna vomit..
bt ntg to vomit..
i tried bt cant..
den watch twilight..
nt bad~
a movie dat wud make me wanna noe de storyline..
nt bad~

28th day of waiting..Sat
early in the morning..
went to wushu..
den coach say yantong n i learn sword..
i was lik WOW..
den practise dat whole day^^

so after dat went for organ class..
OMG..
da hearing session damn hard ei!!
i dunno how 2 start..
bt overall still manageable..

den tuition jor go hsien hse..
play card..
having quite a luck~
den hsien's mom brought us to QQ steamboat..
to celebrate SookFen's Bday!!
da place nt bad..
all u can eat..
23++ per person..
i kept making weird food..
lik fried noodles n fried kangkung..
rly not bad lo!!
even though i dun hav full supply lik salt n wadeva..
bt i tried adding things..
dat noodles i rly loved it!!
bt xh oso wan eat..
so cant eat all~
den i rly 4gt abt everything..
sumhow..
u hav to tell me da things dat i dun lik to hear..
after hearing u say dat..
i totally lost my mood!!
all my mood..
gone!!
so jux endure..
go n c dem sing bday song..
den take vid n pics..
den giv present..
den bb..

den we walked to Jusco..
to watch Twilight:Eclipse..
nt bad oso..
jux..
while watching i rly dun hav mood cuz of other things..
wad dey say is rly nt wad u rly mean..
dey jux saying gud things for u..
Jealousy rly hurts..
even da movie is nt bad..
bt i dun rly hav da mood to watch..
den go bek lo~
da Best Actor Award shud go to me..
im nt in da mood..
bt i managed to change a smile..
a natural 1 once i stepped down da car..
so dat my parents wun rly notice..
i hate dis feeling..
i dun lik to c it!!
i hate it!!!!!!!!!

actually i rly envy dem..
can hav a happy birthday to be celebrated happily..
v frenz..
v lotz of presents..
EVERYTHING!!
bt every year..
mine is during da holidays..
my presents..
is nt how much i expected..
bt presents aren't wad i hope for..
i rly hope i can be lik dem..
at least gt da chance to hear..
dis year..
even though is only a cake.
bt i do appreciate it..
thx..
rly hope....
....
...
..
.

Y muz 'bella' choose 'edward'??
'Jacob' oso lik her..
bt y muz it be 'edward'??
y??
I may nt be as goodlooking as Jacob..
bt i will be lik him..
i will w8 for u..

25th day of waiting..

25th day of waiting..Wed
early in da morning..
go canteen stand..
den w8 perhimpunan..
den gt pengumuman..
practise 1st..
den teac ask me..
he read or i read..
i say..
anything oso can..
den he said he read la..
^^

den kinda many things happened..
all i saw is irresponsibility..
dun mention bout it..
bt nid thx yik shen oso..
bt i saw sumthin dat im quite satisfy with..

den start class jor..
din go up..
went all form 3 classes to giv da notice..
nt enuf..==
den finiz pm din go in class..

~skip~

class kinda bored~
BC class cancelled agn..
3 week..
without Bc lesson..
den after laz class..
rained..
heavier n heavier..

i rly enjoyed walking with u..
alone..
jux the two of us..
i rly enjoyed it..
i enjoy da times when i managed to touch ur hand..
even we r jux playing..
bt..
i rly enjoy d moment..
i wanna be with u..

bt..
whenever i see him..
i'll feel frustrated..
don he hav his own life??
keep on coming 2 disturb u..
u wan disturb oso suan la..
dunno how respect teacher a??
teacher in front dere..
u jux came in without knocking..
who u think u r??!!
live ur own life la..
argh!!
i rly feel moody instantly when i c u disturbing her..
rly rly dun lik it..
im too easy to gt jealous..

friends!!!
argh!!
is it my DUTY to help u guys take da notes when u guys went 2 da camp without me?
is it???
i helped u guys is bcuz we r 'friends'..
bt i dun think dat's wad u think..
i help u guys take is a must..
i dun hope for anything..
jux word..
THANKS~
is enuf..
bt no!!
nt even 1 of u said dat..

urgh!!
den??
ever since form 1 n form 2..
i was in da pingpong club..
bt laz year followed u guys went bola tampar..
den dis year..
went ping pong...
din even reserve a place for me..
went dere tell me full dy..
den i saw all my so called frenz dere..
WTF??!!
den i join other group of frenz..
den did u guys invite me to any of ur games??
no~

dun mention to me wad best buddies anymore..
2 u guys..
im nt 1 of u guys..
u guys r best buddies..
IM NOT!!!
till now..
nt one of u guys ever come n ask me y i lock my blog..
fren enuf??
din bother at all..
if dis is wad u wan..
den dis is wad u gt..
i rly stopped talking v u guys anymore..
if i talk oso a lil..
i wun be talking lik i used to be..

n u!!
i saw lots n lots of ugly pics of urs..
u din scold dem!!
bt u came n scold me when i posted 1 pic of u..
dat was jux a natural pic of u..
do u havv to scold me lik i killed ur whole family??
wad wad wad respect..
if i dun treat u as a fren..
i wun even wanna post or keep dat pic..
dat was jux 1 naturl pic of u..
u say ugly!!
fine ugly ppl normal pic oso ugly de la..
den y u keep saying self lengzai..
ur skin soooo thick..
dun noe wad us MALU at all..
use ur brain think la..
i jux post it n u scold me lik hell..
other ppl??
dey post..
bt u din scold..
say wad respect wad shit!
u go tell them la!
ish!!
if dis da way u treat ur 'friends'..
den i rather dun be ur fren..
no benefits..
u bring me ntg bt misery!!

struggling between love n hate..
i rly hate it bcuz u oso did wad dey do..
bt..
when i look at u..
i jux cant hate u anymore..
in fact..
i cant stop loving u..
how??!!!

say wd wad wad relationship all lie!!
nid ur help den only find u!!
no nid den dun even choi..
from laz time oso..
im nt s important as dem..
u nvr found me.
tell me ur problems..
i find u u oso lik dun wn bother me..
say dis say dat..
all is a lie!!

i rly had enuf of u guys!!
if dis is da way im treated..
it will be da same for u..
at most..
i live alone..
nvm..
i still hav my bro n sis..

ARGH!!!
feeling much better after typing everything out!!
indeed is a gud choice to lock my blog..
even though no1 can c it..
bt at least i can feel better!

24th day of waiting..

24th day of waiting..tue
2day..
went skul..
sat down..
thinking..
wad will happen next..

actually ntg will..
so jux duty..
sailou very notty a..
keep playing other ppl bag dere..
let me c dou jor..
^^

den study lo..
my heart has flew sumwher else..
no heart to study..

bc no teac agn..
sj kinda funny tho~
bt still very hard..
n sleepy @@

recess jux walked around..
do wad i usually do..

moral..
haiz..
gonna make wad song..
y so many weird hw wan???
dunno how do..

den physic..
ntg to do..
keep walking here n dere..
to spend time..
help teac duty..
go class take attendance..
walk here n dere..
teac very funny de..
laz tolong pergi library..
den went jor..
finiz jor..
den agn..
laz, pergi surau..
==
rly omg..

so went bek..
prepare bek home..
overall ntg much..

den went bek..
still thnking..
den tuition den ntg..

dese few days..
im being more n more bad tempered..
so..
pls..
stop making me angry..
especially dat SH!T..
y keep wan annoy me..
i oredi dun wan bother..
u kept on stepping on me..
i rly rly hate u now..
u noe how u duty??
lik a piece of sh!t..
nobody likes u..
is a weird thing u hav a gf anyway..
I HATE U!!
i respected u once..
bt u r da 1 who thinks u r everything..
dun think u r english educated den u r sooo gud..
u r still nt my competitor!!
dun make me gt angry n scold at u!!

omg..
lately rly aad tempered..
makes me keep wanna scold bad words..
bt still can control..

haiz..
i rly hate it when i listened to da so called 'camp song'..
i rly rly hate it!!!
ARGH!!!!

STOP REMINDING ME OF IT ANYMORE!!
PLS!!
I RLY HATE HEARING DOSE THINGS!!

sailou wont on9 lately...
TT
no1 to chat to..
ARGH!!
brain gonna burst!!

23rd day of waiting..

23rd day of waiting..mon
2day updated my blog early..
cuz later i dun think much will happen..
only tuition..

2day early in the morning..
went to skul..
as i figured out..
kl,yx n sf oso no come..
==
so i jux memorize da ikrar agn..
den all of dem hav keys..
i don!!
n all of dem din come...
~~
den went up..
so lucky..
cik tan wanted to fnid yingxin..
2 giv her da key!!
omg..
luck~
den open door..
2 let them carry da sits~

so perhimpunan..
rly dunno wad to do..
i feel da burden upon me..
so went up..
say out..
a nt too big problem~
bt only some words jux din come out rite..

so finiz~
phew..
so did as usual..
finiz duty..
went up class..
dey started talking abt deir camp..
da more dey talk abt..
da angrier or sadder i m..
cuz..
i rly feel..
URGH!!!

if u wanted sum1 to go??
won u ask for at least a few times..
to persuade him/her to go??
bt no~
da way dey ask me is..
A: hey u going......??
B: yea.......
Me:(silent)
A: (telling me)hey u wanna go??
Me: erm.. i dunno..
A: nvm..

==
dis is jux wad dey asked..
i was so coincidentally dere when they were talking abt it..
if it wasn't for dat..
dey wudn't even ask me at all..
i rmbed i wanted sum1 to go so badly..
i kept asking..
rly hoping her to go..
bt now..
all dey said is jux once..
dey nvr asked me..
nt sincerely i noe..

dis r my frenz..
if dat person is him??
i dun think u guys will do dat..
u guys wud keep asking him rite??

den u guys were soooo happy talking bout it..
im jux sitting aside..
faking a smile..
acting lik im interested..
den yenji came n asked me..
y u din go..
den only u guys say..
yalo, y u dun wan go..
u guys nvr mention to me abt dat b4 she asked me..
from dis..
it clearly states dat im nt important at all in u guys heart..
to u guys..
IM NOTHING!!!
with or without me..
u guys will still be very happy!

y!!
dis r called frenz???!!!!
y other ppl will persuade me..
bt y nt u guys??
da ""BEZ FRENS""..

u guys rather persuade other ppl..
bt me..
i noe im nt from khai chee!
bt y he is nt from khai chee..
bt he gets different treatment??

frenz..
always by ur side..
bt r u guys by my side..
2day after duties during da recess..
u guys jux walked away..
leaving me alone to switch off da lights of da hall..
talking happily walking away..
dis is frenz!!
leaving me..
walking bek alone..

rly..
y??
when i try to share my problems..
u guys will jux giv me a cold shoulder..
giving lame answers lik..
@@
en..
dis will oso be da way i reply next time..
all i wan is jux some advice..
a normal 1..
1 dat normal ppl understand..
bt no~
all i gt is..
oo
en..
fine!!

now i rly dunno wad to do..
everyday nid to fake a smile to ppl..
no1 noes wad im truly thinking..
no1..
i guess..
pls..
rly hope sum1 can understand me..

21st, 22nd day of waiting..

21st day of waiting..sat
saturday..
nobody fetch me go school for wushu..
so slept lo..
frenz all at skul..

went for organ practice..
went dere 30 min earlier..
cuz of bro..
so waited..
den teac set da rhythm..
nice~
maybe 1 day record down..
XD
bt im nt too gud oso..
haha.
xiasui-kan~

den went for bio..
sat alone~
den saw da notes..
we can gt vitamin B from:
Black-eyed peas..
teac oso nt sure wad lai de..
jux guess..
den i thought..
listen to deir songs oso gt vitamin..
^^
den laugh to myself..
==

so went bek..
hav dinner..
chat..
play pokemon..
plant Vs zombie..
fb~

dis is da 1st nite without mahjong..

im rly missing every moment..
every moment we've been thru..
i...
..

22nd day of waiting..sun
no go jog..
cuz laz nite slept late..

woke up with a sore back..
played pokemon!!
all my Eevee-s evolved!!
vaper,jolt,flar,esp,umbr,leaf,glac-eon
all 7 oso evolve jor~
achieved my dream~

den prepare n went for tuition..
2day sat v shukoon n sifu..
wd happened is kinda funny..

...

bek jor..
chat a while with sailou..
den went out agn..
to rawang..
go hav dinner with grandpa@ma..
so went dere..
while going..
passed by a jammed road..
den look around us..
OMG!!
monkeys!!
damn lot..
damn cute..
bt damn pity..
cuz dey r searching for food..
n dey lost deir habitat..
cuz humans cut down trees to develop..
y!!!
ish..
den pass by da jammed road..
is actually every1 wnted to see monkeys..
ntg 2 jam about in front..==

den sms v sailou..
yea..
da bills..
up up up up up~~
up~
up~~
even if da sky is flying up~
==
bt nvm la..
worth it..
since i oso saved a lot of money during da recess..
as a substitution la~
at least sms le can feel happier..

den went bek..
did ntg..
den rmb gt hw..
RUSH!!

den after i finiz my report..
only i noe i did it wrongly..
den do agn..
TT
wasted 2 papers..
haiz..

...
now every1 bek from camp jor..
i noe many will cut school 2molo..
cuz tired..
bt i hope i can c u guys..
...

yea..
i kinda agree now..
since Woody can do it..
i shud oso do it..
y shud i be sooo sensitive abt it..
i will try my bez..
2 change myself..
I'll try...
hope so....

20th day of waiting..

20th day of waiting.. Fri
2day is our school's open day..
early in morning..
jux go n prepare things..
den tugas~

i jux observe ppl..
n try to help..
ntg much..
nt as much as dose who r at da gate..
keep running up n down..
rly feel guilty..
den dun force dem la..
dey oso wun rest..
rly wanna thank dose who in charge at da gate..

den jux walk here n dere..
did ntg much..
den gt 1 'gathering haram'..
we sat dere at da corridor..
a bunch of pengawas..
funny dao~~~
den jy keep bully yongwai n yau..
c!!!
tell u dun wan listen..
make dou ppl bu shuang jor lo..
haha~

den ntg much..
took many pics..
maybe put next time..
bt if put..
sure let ppl hit..
so hmm~~
dunno^^

den jux spend time at skul..
teacha said ntg bad abt me..
haha..
overall ok..
only weak in Bm,Pm, Sj..

den ntg much tho~
so w8ed until 12.30..
1 by 1 went bek..
only seemin n loohong still dere..
doing deir duty..
so jux acc dem lo..
cuz feel guilty..
den went up put paper..
saw mrs.lee..
den she insisted to treat a bottle of drink..
thanks~

den went bek..
a parent came..
asked for 5I..
den is saw loohong dun feel lik bringing..
so i jux took over..
brought her to da taman..
she say she wan to find da 2nd class..
which was dedikasi..
since we've changed..
den i thought of maybe dun hav teac..
since every teac went down..
so i suggested dat i go up n check.
so dat she won hav to go up for ntg..
den she saw she wans to find lynnyen..
oo!!
she's chiwing's mom..
cant recognize..
den went up..
found her..
went down..
den rest lo..
no duty jor..

so bilik pengawas locked..
den went to xh hse..
since ntg to do at skul..
every1 haven come..

walk alone..
legs very tired jor..
still wan go so far..
..
alone~
thought of a lot of things..
keep asking myself y..
y dis y dat..
dis is da challenge god gav it to me..
dis person is da challenge on me..
on da way..
let 1 L- licence driver horn..
her car very far jor..
very slow..
den many car overtake jor..
i saw it coming very slow..
jux cross da road lo..
oso kena horn..
haha..
den pass by 1 hse..
din c dou da dog..
suddenly bark beside me..
shocked agn..
haha

den reach jor..
chat..
sailou rly geng wo..
lik dat oso guess dou is me..
means u noe my way of talking..
haha..
touched~~

den walk bek to skul agn..
==
reach jor..
w8 a while den only go out eat..
while eating..
chat a lil..

den bek dere..
w8 for dad to come..
sum still think i come for camp..
funny..
in my uniform??
impossible..
den i called my dad to come fetch me at 2.30..
bt he came at 3..@@
ish..
nvm..
jux sat dere n chat..

den bek jor..
erm..
mood..
same..
slept..
woke up..
mood..
same..
den heard dat afternoon gt teacher stil rmb me..
n gt praise me oso..
^^
haha
happy~~

a different tuition feel 2day..
cuz out of 5 ppl..
im da only 1 who came..
so sat alone at da corner..
ken say..
da month of 7 dun go camping..
u will see white things float by~
if dun bliv..
go toilet in da middle of da night..
or peek into da room..
zd..
den sum1 say..
"u gt eye prob ar.."
dunno how translate la..
bt kinda funny..

almost 8..
received 1 msg..
den sms jor..
den bek home..
den ntg..
mood..
worse after thinking of things..

yes..
many r asking da same question..
bt my answer is...
...
nvm..
is jux da matter of my fate..
perhaps it wud be happier without....

im WOODY..
haha..
only sum1 noe y..
XD

yor..
y bek so early..
no chance take pic v u eii!!!
TT

saw sumthin at fb..

☆YOU CALL ME A BITCH ☆
☆A BITCH IS A DOG☆
☆DOGS BARK☆
☆BARK IS ON TREES☆
☆TREES ARE NATURE☆
☆NATURE IS BEAUTIFUL, ☆
☆SO THNX FOR THE COMPLIMENT☆

dis is hilarious..
nvr thought of it dat way..
haha..




Wondering wad will u be doing in dese 3 days..

cant c ya..

wad r u doing now??

haiz..

nt important anymore..

^^-Forever Forgetful-^^

19th day of waiting..

19th day of waiting.. Thur
2day..
im very very very moody now..

dis morning..
is my turn to go up stage..
weirdly..
2day is akwardly weird..
so many teachers there..
many pengumuman..
den pn. Norli oso tried to train me..
damn scary man..
den she stand bside me n wanted me to read..
omg..
so many errors..
many wrong..
omg..
den teac say..
mana blh macam ini baca..
den tell kailin teac me..
den i was lik..
omg..
i dunno wad i did..
bt i rly wan thank her..
cuz she rly gav me an experience..
a special 1..
im nt sure i can do it anot..
im rly rly afraid now..
i dun hav wad it takes to be 1..

den go hav meeting..

den go bio lab..
den PJK..
ish..
i din even noe nid to pass up..
so y wud i pass up..
i din wad u asked for..
bt i din pass up..
den i jux gt hit by a cane..
dis is rly..
ARGH!!!!!
in dis scold..
i wasn't hit by a cane b4..
except for da 1 Pn.Tong(retired) gav..
i still rmbed till now..
every1 making noise..
i sit dere..
quietly..
dinn take out book only..
den i gt hit..
others gt book bt noisy din..
ish..

den dis time..
din pass up bt i did..
oso kena..
ARGH!!!

den suan..
went down..
dun feel lik playing..
so jux took my shirt..
den go stand bside badminton court..
chat v sailou..
haiz..
den shouted a lil..
cuz litter bugs..
den dat SHIT..
haiz..
bully my sailou..
feel self useless..
cant 'protect' him..
sry..

den dey went bek up..
so went pingpong dere stand..
went dewan..
saw ky's drawing..
wow..
better than mine ALOT!!

den..
haiz..
recess..
y..
my plan always gt ruined..
nearly..
i jux gt a close chance..
den..
u guys come ruin it..
...
blablabla..

den bi..
math..
all ntg much..

so went bek..
ntg much..
at gate agn saw sailou..
he told me..
his sj project gt prob..
den sumhow..
my mood turn bad..
cuz i cant help him when he's in nid..
my CPU is nt with me..
ntg is dere to connect dat damn printer..
rly feel useless..
cant help when he's in nid..
...

...
...
...

den tuition..
very..
haiz..
everytime oso..
jealous..
ARGH!!!

bek jor..
did ntg bt msn..

...
no mood..
dunnno y..
no appetite eat jor..
eat 1 bite..
den gt vomit de feel..
very hard only finiz 1 bowl of rice..
...

moody..
dunno y..
since std 1..
im very sensitive..
especially when it comes to frenz..
dunno y..
i always hav da feel dat i can hav da person to be my fren..
only me..
y do i keep having dis kind of thinking..
it is rly a suffer for me..
i jux cant control myself..
from thinking abt it..
im sry abt it..
i hate it..
bt i jux cant change it..
perhaps is a part of me..
my signature personality..
dat's wad makes me guilty of livin my life..


im rly rly rly..
frustrated of myself..
i hate myself...

mui...
din chat v u muxh lately..
bt i noe u gt some prob de..
jux dun think so much ba..
do wadeva dat makes u happy..

sailou..
u oso..
dun think so much jor ba..
u will hav da chance de..