43rd day of waiting

43rd day of waiting..Sun
early in the morning..
woke up..
den go market..
buy lots of things..
den bek home..
omg..
no time to chop the pork..
den go tuition..
very tired..

when sitting beside u..
was very happy..
bt all on the sudden..
i thought of sumthin..

原来我一直以来都自作多情···
你对我···
没有任何的感觉···
虽然跟你在一起是非常开心的事···
可是当我想起那事实时···
我的心就会禁不住流泪···
就像刚才补习的时候···
我真的顶不顺···
选择坐远些···
可是···
依然想着···
许多个“为什么”···

我不配···
我不够体贴···
我不帅···
又不够聪明···
没有什么值得你去喜欢···
可是为什么···
我却不肯放下···
我该怎么办···

bek home..
feel sad..
den i quickly go n prepare for dinner..
mom haven bek..
so i do myself 1st..
den using da cleaver to release sadness..
den it was lik racing against time..
or else dinner will be late..
im rly disappointed for wad i've made..
even my mom n dad kinda like it..
bt i dont..
is jux not as nice lik my grandma's..
im nt dat gud after all..

den ntg much..

rite now..
i rly wanna find sum1 to talk to..
bt only i realise sumthin..
nobody is dere when i need..
...
how..