Our 2nd, 3rd, 4th day

2nd day..Sun
went tuition..
den ntg much..
jux feel very happy..
den mom say bring me to her skul..
den dunno y..
i jux cant sleep..
lay on bed for hours..
den decided go out..
watch mummies alive..
for 3 episodes..
quite happy..
rmb me of my childhood moments..

3rd day..Mon
wear my con..
den go to skul..
saw many aunties..
all say me tall n handsome jor..
quite happy..
den follow mom in class..
da students very cute..
keep looking behind..
den i look behind..
wad so nice har?
maybe looking at me..
nobody noes..
bt deir studying way kinda funny de~

den bek home..
finally feel tired..
took off my lens..
den sleep.
till 9 o'clock..
woke up..
i still feel tired..

den chat v ppl..
sailou a..
curse me la..
dun hav 2nd day..

nt hor..
if gt anything..
muz find me de..
24/7..
i will be dere for u..
rmb i'll always be dere for u..
F.O.C.

4th day..Tue
morning..
woke up..
hav McD for breakfast..
went to skul..
help to paint..
den play a while..
den paint agn..
waihong n yauz saw da msg==
paiseh..
haiz..

den went to hav spaggethi for lunch..
den bek home..
nap..
till 5 sumthin..
woke up..
den go tuition..
u noe..
im rly happy being joked by them..
especially when i received ur msg..
bek home..
had my dinner..

suddenly i received ur msg..
u asked me to change da word PSYCHO..
i dun mind..
bt i dunno wad to change yet..
den i started to gt sad..
bcuz u dun trust me..
u gt angry v me..
no matter wad i said..
u wun trust..
in my heart..
dere's only u..
i deleted da blog..
i changed da name..
i changed things dat r related to PSYCHO..
u noe..
rite now..
i'm rly disappointed..
i noe im wrong..
bt..
..
perhaps..
im jux suitable to be any1's bf..

is only da 4th day n we quarreled..
nt quarrel..
bt..
a war..
a cold 1..
i rly dunno how..
perhaps..
im jux typing to myself..

who can see my blog..
i dunno..
who wans..
i dunno..
who can find it..
i dunno..



i'll jux quit anything dat relates to psycho..
i wanaa quit my life..
dere's ntg else i wan now..
ntg..

Our 1st day

Our 1st day~Sat
6.00a.m. only can sleep..
haiz..
den slept in da living room..
haiz..
no mood..
bt ppl r making it worse..
put 1 status dere..
dun wan bother den suan liao..
come here..
din even cheer me up..
only noe how correct my grammar mistake..
bt i jux endure it..
dun wanna scold any1..

den go tuition..
tired..
suddenly i felt lik crying..
bcuz da things happened was lik 2 years ago..
u told me u lik me bt..
u dun wanna start a relationship..
dat moment..
i rly feel lik crying..
it was lik pouring acid on my heart..
is it my fate??
da girl i lik nvr wanna be together v me??

den nvm..
jux continue chat..
den during bio..
very sleepy..
bt when addmath..
felt better..

den go sri hartamas hav dinner..
whole day keep sms!!
den finally..
haha..
my 1st time..
omg!!
having a gf..
haha^^
damn happy..
sry if i rly did anything wrong..
maybe haven gt d hang of it..
bt i'll try my bet..
beginners ma..
haha~

I LOVE YOU!!!

The End Of Waiting

this post is dedicated to sum1..
im sry dat i've hurted u so much..

i cant bliv i cried for u..
i cant bliv i gt moody when i noe u lik sum1 bt i dunno who..
i cant bliv i cant sleep cuz of u..

bt now i noe y..
is bcuz..
I LOVE YOU!!

167th day of waiting

167th day of waiting??Fri
morning..
woke up..
den dad brought me go c optician..
den went sri damansara for food..
omg..
da fly went into da drink..
==

den go c optician jor..
wow..
rly a gud experience..
eyes very itchy n dry..
dey rly yeng lo..
lik dat den noe ur power jor..

den went tuition..
saw annie..
i was lik shocked..

den bek home..
practise organ..
den rush..
eat dinner..
den go jusco..
prac..
teac gav me some chocolates..
den da improvisation rly hard..
den bek home..
do hw..
watch tv..
ddt v shukoon..
rly no mood play jor..

165th, 166th day of waiting

165th day of waiting..Wed
morning woke up..
den go 1U..
go MPH..
walked around..
found ZORA!!!
wahahaha..
long time no c..
den she say she hungry..
den go find gt wad lo..
den choose jor KFC..
den say wad she dun eat fried food much..
dun drink soft drink much..
seldom drink v ice..
@@
blaming me jek..
T_T

den talk talk talk..
chonghwa ind. rly hard la..
haiz..
so geng..
den intend go n walk de..
den siuhou called me..
say wan go kfc..
den went dere agn..
we chose da sit next to da 1 we sit b4 @@
den chat dere..
dey 1st time meet each other..
bt luckily siuhou very frenly de..
or else sure cool cool de~
den we 3 walk haha..
find mh bt she no come..
haiz..

den hou say wan go work jor..
den we go parkson walk walk..
up n down..
w8ing to see him..
den saw jor..
walked a while den go out jor..
den she went bek home..
i joined mom n dad..
den walked a while..
legs damn tired..

den went bek..
den night prepare go genting jor..
den had our dinner..
nice~
den went bek..
in car..
play v bro~
making weird noises..
haha..
weird sounds..
kinda funny xia..
bt haiz..
seldom tell my bro abt my probs..
he oso din tell me abt his too..
maybe he dun hav??

bek home..
den play ddt..
agn..
play till very late..

den suddenly..
sailou stop jor..
asked me some question..
dunno y suddenly feel 'touched'..
maybe cuz long time din rly chat jor..
den chatted a while..
felt kinda relieved..

166th day of waiting??Thu
woke up..
on9..
den go tuition..
heard is saimun's bday..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY~!
haiz..
4gt bring calculator..

den ntg much..
nite..
wow..
many ppl playing da 'DARE' game..
haha..
den liked many post..
gt wad write in other wall..
i love u..
i miss u..
change da p.pics..
in a relationship with sum1..
den now play dou jor..
'in a relationship' with ching ee..
haha!
XD

den play ddt..
shukoon oso start jor..
jiayou!
haha

bt suddenly i gt very frustrated..
cuz being alone..
plus..
i requested for sumthin..
bt wad i gt??
ntg!!
giv me lame excuse!
ish!!!!!!
rly hate it..
if i can do it da other way..
i oso wun find u for help la!
argh!!!
fine!
dun wan den dun wan!!
damn frutrated..

den continue play ddt..

rite now rly feel complicated..
i dunno who i lik..
i cant gt over myself..
i cant let go..
or maybe i can??
i duno..
do i luv u?
do i??
im rly afraid i will only hurt u..
hw can i stop myself??
wad shud i do??

oh sh!t..
start to think of different things at da same time..
i think i lik u bt i think i dont..
i think i can put her down bt i think i cant..
make up ur mind!!!!!
seriously..
make up ur mind!!!!!!!!!!
i hate u!!!!
argh!!

going crazy dy..
shud i??
may i??
or most importantly..
can i??

enough pls..
y shud i think so much..
no1 will lik me too!!
argh!!
wad's wrong v me!!
argh argh argh!!

160th,161st, 162nd, 163rd, 164th day of waiting

160th day of waiting..Fri
since long time no blog..
mostly cuz of ddt..
haha..
ntg much..
woke up..
den on9..
w8 go tuition..
den do math..
haiz..
few weeks no come jor..
self learn abt base number..
den teac teach bout graph of functions..
hoho..
hate graph..
den teac said ask chen hsien stay at other class..
since he went dere..
n teac dou diff topic jor..
haha..
cham~

161st day of waiting..Sat
morning woke up..
lazy go wushu..
den go tuition..
sj..
long time no learn in chinese jor..
haha..
weird..
bt nice..
den bio..
ntg much..
den go bek home..
den hav dinner..
bored la..

162nd day of waiting..Sun
wake up den prepare tuition..
den krg..
den ntg much..
suddenly feel my holiday all da same..
everyday on9..
den everynite play ddt till late late..
play da F3 ppl..
quite funny..

163rd day of waiting..
whole day ntg..
so jux play game..
play play play..
den go rawang..
go hav dinner v grandma/pa..
den watch diving dere..
malaysia silver..
dunno hw many diving silver jor..

noe y malaysia cant gold??
cuz at pool dere sure gt no diving de..
so cant find new talents..
haha!
@@

den went bek home..
play till nite nite agn..
dis time lagi funny..
shaiho asked me it jiewei..
den hor..
sum1 say put me same group v gwen..
den i no c dou..
i replied to shai ho..
u think i dun wan meh..
den i saw da post..
oh shit==
den every1 kept saying..
damn zd..
bt kinda funny la..
damn omg la..
den many other rumors too..

164th day of waiting..Tue
woke up..
go tuition..
den finally zora found me!!!
haha..
called her n chatted for 8 min..
rly zd..
go cameron no bring hp..
cuz mafan @@
1st time hear things lik dis..

den decide jor da gathering..
excited^^
den ntg much..
w8 till nite..
tuition agn..
bm teac damn funny..
siuhou damn pity..
keep let me bully..
XP

den jux came bek..
den play agn..
cham lo!!
addicted jor..
TT
bt nice..
haha~

158th, 159th day of waiting

158th day of waiting..Wed
din do anything much..
around 5 sumthin..
went jusco..
cuz organ prac replacement..
new environment jor..
den after dat..
go hav dinner..
den went bek home..

den wow..
bz dao~~
multitasking all at da same time..
sms-ing..
ddt-ing..
chatting..
ps2-ing..
singing..
all at da same time..
rly cant concentrate..
omg..

den once agn..
feel kinda disappointed..

159th day of waiting..Thur
morning..
go yan's hse..
go in jor..
den c dem play mahjong..
omg..
den my turn jor..
haiz..
many weird/funny/ angry stuff happened..
hsien keep win wrongly==
make him hav to pay all~
bt everytime dat happens..
my 'cards' ure nt bad de..
den gt 1 round..
rly made me mad..

u missed da round jor..
now u nt enuf 'cards'..
u jux simply take??
wher can it be lik dis..
if im da 1 doing it..
will u jux keep quiet??
fine!!
cuz of it..
made me lose..
ish ish ish!!
play dou lik dis..
wher still fun??
no mood play jor..
*leave

den jux go around..
do ntg much..
until w8 go tuition..
ntg much oso..

den bek..
mom n dad's anniversary..
bt dad went for badminton..
so ate steamboat v mom..
XD
2 ppl only..
in a rainy day..
syok..

den bek home..
jux on9..
chat..
watch movie..
Amazing Race Asia 4..
haiz..
1 Malaysia team out jor..
still is da group v potential 1..

den play ddt==
omg..
saw all sorts of ppl..
gt sum very kind..
i lvl 7..
he lvl 21..
let me kill jor..
still praise me..
XD
beginner's luck..

bt i oso saw sum..
keep scolding vulgar..
suan la..
keep in heart..
until i saw 1 thing..
"talk english la!"
den i rly feel..
omg??
den dat's when i started to quarrel v dem..
omg..
self speaking broken english..
still wan ppl to speak english==
amateurs~
haiz..
all da things u guys said rly rly funny!!
lik making a fool outta urselves..
XD

bt sumhow..
i still feel..
sad..
or moody to be precise..
jux felt dat..
im nt appreciated..

isit perhaps im too sensitive??
or i've asked too much..
maybe i tot i can gt bek things dat gave bek..
bt..

rly hope u can treat me lik u treat others..
come find me when u face prob..
bt..
everytime i hear ppl saying abt whose whose whose prob..
all i can do is sit aside n listen..
nobody will tell me abt it personally..
m i dat nt trust-worthy??
i hope i can change everything..
feeling complicated now..



last bt nt least..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JIAEN~

156th,157th day of waiting

156th day of waiting..Mon
morning..
woke up..
tot i can go jog..
bt my dad dunno y so early wake up jor..
haiz..
suan le..
go bek to sleep..

go skul..
actually intend go later..
since dey mention jor b4 8 nid reach...
bt i afraid ppl go jor tot no nid help..
den i go earlier lo..
jux in case..
den omg..
dey say gt perhimpunan..
faster borrow oliver's uniform..
omg..
rush rush rush..
den start jor..
while starting..
suddenly sum1 called me!!!
omg..
phone vibrating..
bt i ignored..
siao a!!
call so long==
so many ppl at skul still wan find me..
siao ei!!

den finally finiz..
haiz~
den go up start arranging da tables..
omg..
tables 2 by 2..
omg..
damn tired..
den my hands gt lot of scar jor..
mcm suicide jor hands gt scar==
haha..
scare jor many ppl==

haiz..
jux keep moving..
damn tired..
den dat time i rly no mood..
i dun wanna eat n dun wanna drink..
whole morning rly din eat n drink..
den intend wan walk bek home..
bt dad came..
argh..
suan le..

den jux go home..
evening..
wanna go jog..
bt all my pants wash jor..
means i nid to wear new pants..
n dirty it?
haiz..
no mood jor..
den no go jog..
haiz..

whole day de plan all kena interrupted..
rly hate it..

157th day of waiting..Tue
go bek to skul agn..
haiz..
changed da room to store room..
n store room to another..
change jor..
den suddenly say wan move agn..
argh!!!

few of us came only..
den finally finiz!!!
wahh!!!!!

den went out eat..
sneakily..
haha..
teac oso sneak out..
den had food..

went bek..
noe some result..
my bi.
say gud nt gud enuf..
still lose to him!!
argh!!!
bt actually kinda satisfy~
bt i wanna win him@@

den i knew sumthin..
u told me phone no money jor..
bt i noticed dat u sms v other ppl..
was dat jux an excuse??
or m i jux too annoying??
or i jux misunderstood??

u noe??
i rly hurts to noe it..

haiz..
went home..
nap..
no mood..

den go tuition..
da bm..
pantun..
very @@
omg..
i rly luv it..
it rly talks bout hw i feel..
except for da 2nd para..

haiz..
now my heart is rly complicated..
i duno whether i still lik u anot..
i tot i can finally put down..
bt when i c u wiping ur tears..
a kind of feeling struck me agn..
i dunno how??
who can tell me?????

155th day of waiting

155th day of waiting..Sun
woke up..
prepare for tuition...
den sit v sifu..
rly whole day din talk to them..
bt dey din even bother abt my presence..

den bek home..

den nite eat at aman puri..
so many ppl..
w8ed for 1 hour++
den weirdly..
saw dat family agn..
every sunday go out eat oso so lucky can c dem de..
fate??
even go diff place oso can c dou..
@@

nite..
jux play ps2..
quite satisfy with it..

bt..
i still feel moody..
dere's a lot of things im feeling..

i dun think im gud in socializing..
i dunno hw to say dis..
maybe is nt dat my frenz fault..
everything is with me!!!
im da 1 is always da problem!!
even in primary skul..
i feel dat my fren treat me kinda badly..
i was excited dat maybe i can come to a new place..
dun hav to stand dat..
bt now..
i think my thought is all wrong..
dey r nt da prob..
i m da 1..
now even in new skul..
i still feel so..
y??
is nt cuz of dey treat me bad..
is nt cuz of dey dun appreciate me..
all is me!!
im da main cause of it..
my attitude..
my everything..
perhaps..
dis is me..
i jux cant change it..
maybe im too stubborn..

ppl keep saying ketua pengawas..
bt..
i noe it myself..
i jux cant do it..
i dun hav da power..
i dun hav everything..
i noe maybe sum of u oso feel dat..
i jux dun worth it..

perhaps..
im born to live alone..
im nt a society person..
i dun feel lik living anymore..
i rly hope..
dis will be da laz chance i can breathe..

i dun wanna live anymore!!!

154th day of waiting

154th day of waiting..Sat
morning woke up..
still feel a lil full..
muz be dat pig..
laz nite indeed was quite nice..
bt when i saw da couples..
i feel envy..
haiz..
den dey played love story once..
rly bring me bek da memories..
den sms v sailou..
since very bored dere..
bt many ppl..
103 tables..
da way dey serve rly funny..
very fast..

den dis morning..
jux go wushu..
bcum naib pengerusi..
no feel cuz i dun wan so fan abt these stuffs jor..

den jux practise..

den bek home..
prepare..
den go bio..
feel kinda tired..
i din speak much to them though..
even though he talked to me 1st..
i replied wad he said den no talk jor..
dun feel lik talking so much..

den bek home..
chat a while..
den went jogging..
dis time..
ran more..
more tired..
more sweat..
bt all i noe is..
i felt better..

at nite..
mom n dad went for dinner..
so i jux on9 at home..
whole nite sms v chingee..

den keep msg full..
i rly dunno hw..
my msg full..
mostly oso abt ur msgs..
i rly dun feel lik deleting it..
it rly brings me a lot of memories..
bt..
ARGH~!

den sailou on9..
chat..
bt..
guess dat im nt da person u can talk to anyway..
bt rly hope u can cheer up..


suddenly i feel so lonely here..
even those who k..
or i tot dey k..
dun even bother abt me anymore..
guess i rly dun belong here..
will any1 wonder if dey dun c me anymore??
guess not...

...

hopeless

...

u're such a failure..

153rd day of waiting

153rd day of waiting..Fri
morning went to skul..
sook fen dem play cards..
den help sook fen..
she damn lucky..
bt hor skill nt so gud only..
haha~!

den perhimpunan..
ei~
zd..
y c dou sailou de..
tot he nt coming..

den went to bilik sj..
teac said sumthin..
makes me feel alil sad..
suddenly feel lik she very gud..
laz day jor only change till lik dat..
omg~

den took our result..
(so faz man 1st time lo!)

oh shit!!
65==
gt improvement..
bt compare v dem..
i very weak..
cuz all of dem oso 80++
me??
65..
fine..
while walking v u guys..
u guys kept saying dis n dat..
i only gt 65..
fine..
even though im nt happy abt it..
jux keep it in my heart..

den..
went bek class..
tot of havin fun..
den teac ask us do things..
den finally went bek class..
feel lik having fun to 4gt bout sj..
bt..
dis is when a worse thing happened..

dey playin cards..
sook fen ask me w8..
den go find pn lee..
den w8 for her..
w8 jor..
she come n tell me..
abt monday de thing..
wan me go find pn lee..
den she continued playing cards..
WTF??!!
den my so called frenz?
none of dem even offered to acc me..
fine..
nvm..
go do it!

den find jor pn lee..
ask jor..
she nids help..
ask me find sum f3 de to help her..
bt i vounteered..
cuz i dun wanna go bek class..
den do do do~
go find many teac..
ask dem to check da paper for confirmation..
den sum teac rly..
"u help me check la!"
WTF??
dis is ur thing la!
hw on earth do i noe dis is rite or wrong??
u may rite wrong on da original copy oso!
think la dui!!

whole day walk up n down..
finding teac..
legs damn tired..
im so freakin' F*ed up!!!!!

den saw chingee..
haiz..
so shy..
see dou me stil wan walk away sneakily..
suan le..
so jux say hi 1st~
XP

den ntg much..
asked f3 to help complete..
den..
go bek class..
even bek jor..
felt my presence is nt important..
no1 cared..
suan le..
i 'sleep'!!
lay down dere..
as if im very tired..
bt all i jux wanna do is to ignore the world..
im nt rly 'sleeping'..

den waihong came n find me..
dunno hw to do==
den suan le..
go bek down help him..
den finally finiz jor~

go dewan..
sit v f3..
play cards with dem..
1st round den win jor..
woohoo~
den 2nd round..
let teac stop jor..
cuz cannot play poker..
sh!t..
teac noticed i from form 4 jor..
ask me go bek..
bt i plead teac haha..
so end up stay dere..
den jiasheng still gav me sum snacks..
wahahaha..
den still gt around 10 min..
went bek class..
take my bag..
once agn..
no1 cared..
fine..
go bek down to dewan v my bag..
take pics..
den teac announce 2day laz day jor..
haiz..

feeling lik being v f3 better..
even though sumtimes topic cant chat..
bt at least sum care abt my presence..
bt hor..
kinda sad lo..
sailou din choi me!!!
sit at dewan dere so long..
oso no choi me..
TT
seizai!
ask u take pic den keep say dun wan..
TT
bt anyway..
happy holiday~!
wahahaha
rmb dat promise a!!

den bek home..
on9..
den sleep..
later still gonna go for sum1's wedding dinner..
haiz..
forced to..
TT
hope da food is nt disappointing..

150th, 151st, 152nd day of waiting..

150th day of waiting..Tue
morning go to skul..
whole day din go in class..
stay at bilik pengawas..
after perhimpunan den meeting..
den keep stay dere..
den heard physics teac gonna teach f5 things..
den dun wan go jor..
go help f3~
bt actually go play la..

ntg much..
sum parents rly..
@@
den ntg much..

bek home den nap..
den ntg much..
heard ppl say my physics 88..
highest..
same v peiyen..
bt nt sure oso..

tuition..
6-9..
feeling lik is monday~
bt feel better..

den bek home..

once agn..
i asked for a chance..
bt..
once agn..
failed..
i rly dun understand..
y!!

i rly cant 4gt abt u!!
everything reminds me of u!!
da moments we've been thru!!
da dance between me n u!!
argh!!!
i cant stop myself..

cried whole nite..
feeling my heart very sour..

151st day of waiting..Wed
go to skul..
no mood..
den perhimpunan oso gt a lil mistake..
haiz..
den go bek class..
play cards whole day..
gt bio paper jor..
feeling kinda sad..
cuz weak jor..
argh!!

bek home..
no nap..
den went jogging around da garden..
quite satisfied~
den bek jor..
kept sweating..
omg..
1st time sweat so furiously..
since months ago..
very satisfy~
indeeed very 'sexy'..
finally und wad sailou meant jor..

haiz..
tired..
even when i playing game..
oso nearly slept..
bt..
when i wan go bed..
sumthin was in my mind..
i cant sleep..
even im very tired..

我在你们心中到底有什么地位？？
好朋友？？
好兄弟？？
可是当我有事时··
那又有哪位好朋友会主动来找我？？
来问候我？？
当你们有事时··
又有谁会想到找我诉苦？？
你们有事时··
会想到我吗？？
往往都是最后才知道发生什么事··

有谁真的会真正关心我？？
来找我时··
都只是要跟我借东西··
那我不开心时··
你有理过吗？？

我就只是个过客··
也许太过自以为是了··
还以为你们会把我放在你们心里的第一··
就算没第一也会想到我··
可是··
我在你们心中只是个路过的蚂蚁··
每人看见··

152nd day of waiting..Thur
1st time wax my hair n go to skul..
cant do much since not much time..
jux simply..
bt nt much difference oso..
bt weird~

den whole day jux play cards..
n do sum pengawas things..
den play cards whole day la..
haiz..
still dun hav da mood..

147th, 148th, 149th day of waiting

147th day of waiting..Sat
morning woke up..
headache..
no go wushu..
den go for organ lesson later~
hehe..
quite successful..
cuz managed to play many songs..
den..
go for bio lesson..
den haiz..
headache saje..
bek home dat time..
ish..
dey still late..
haiz..
den go hav dinner..

den nite mahjong..
kinda hav no luck~
maybe dat seat rly nt lucky de..
haha^^
bro sit dere oso no luck..

148th day of waiting..Sun
morning woke up late..
den headache..
so no go tuition..

den stay at home whole day..
on9..
study~

nite..
cant sleep..
keep thinking bout her..
da moments we danced..
rly feel..
once in a lifetime opportunity..
who will gt da chance to dance v da girl u luv often?
i rly rly miss da moments..

149th day of waiting..Mon
went to skul..
morning perhimpunan dun wan go up stage..
cuz gt a lil headache..
jux stay down dere..
den many dye jor hair de ppl kena tangkap..
luckily sailou din kena..
c!
listen to me wun wrong de!

den jux w8 for SPBT de things..
gt alicia's book @@

den after recess..
exam..
sivik..
omg..
crazy de..
nt too easy den too hard==

den pjk~
omg!
1st 5 questions out b4==
luckily gt read..
den still gt 2 Q repeat de..
bt many i dunno de~
keep 4gt..

den finally end!!
woohoo~~

bek home..

gt sum news..
sum1 mcm very happy when gt my books==
zd~~

den zhao hong cr8ed a group..
for 6K'2006 de..
damn nice!
cuz every1 oso seldom chat..
bt 2day rly chat dou..
keep chattin~
haha!
den ming xiang..
i rly dunno is she until 2day..
haha..
da funny thing is she oso dunno is me^^
say add me cuz c dou lengzai..
XD
rly rly zd..
bt da prob is da pic dun look lik me oso @@
haha..
damn happy chattin v dem~

den i try to on my PS2..
play yugioh~
omg!!
rly on dou..
even though many tries..

bt end up oso success..
play play play..
long time no play jor..
bt da tv nt nice..
so damn red..
bt at least can play..
from 4 sumthin play till 12.30++
woohoo~~

2day damn happy~
1st..
EXAM FINALLY OVER!!

2nd..
on dou PS2 jor..
played many long time no play de game!!
muahaha

3rd..
chat bek v primary skul frenz..
damn happy^^

Last~
sailou finally make his promise~
wahaha..
finally c dou dat pic jor..
dunno w8ed how long~
bt at last c dou jor..
muahahaha~!

damn happy la 2day ^^

146th day of waiting

146th day of waiting..Fri
woke up..
kinda tired..
den w8 for lunch..
on9 on9 on9..
chat v chingee..
kinda funny xia.
keep saying me cute..
@@
den i act childish~

den afternoon go grandma hse..
hav haircut..
omg..
dis time damn short..
den used a lil wax..
nt sure hw use..
simply..
XD

den hav dinner..
sms sailou..
no reply me!
urgh!!

den jux went bek home..
let mom saw da dancing vid..
a lot of comments~
XP
den bek home..

2nd msg..
STILL NO REPLY!
ish~~

rite now..
i rly dunno hw..
i dunno wad im thinking..
yes..
i still hav da hatred feeling..
bt..
when i saw her pic..
i rly feel!!
..ARGH..
cant resist luving her..

i rly dunno whether i still lik her anot..
i dunno i still hav feelings for her anot..
i cant stop myself from thinking..

rly feeling lik finding sum1 to talk with..
bt..
i cant..
dere's no1 i can talk with..
i rly wanna find sum1..
bt when i nid it..
only i knew no1 is dere for me when i needed..
jux be alone here..

~headache~
think gonna fall ill soon..

145th day of waiting

145th day of waiting..Thur
2day woke up..
ntg much..
den on9..
chat v sailou a lil..
haiz sore throat jor..
take k la!!
drink water ma..
still wan eat chocolate jam!!
no die b4 ke??
ish!
take k la..
adui..

den he off9..
dad bought lunch..
omg..
RM30++
y??
cuz he tot is crabmeat fried noodles..
bt when i open it..
da whole crab is dere!
omg..
den had crab for lunch..

SH!T..
dunno y stomach ache..
i no eat chili wo..
rly SH!T dis time..

den go tuition..
wher my frustration starts..
went in..
saw chen hsien sit jor dat place..
no more place for me..
fine..
go behind..
i tahan!!
smiled!!
even though i dun lik it..
bt i smiled!!
dun wan think so much..
sit behind..
bt did u guys bother??
no!
fine..
sit dere..
press phone..
acc lik gt things do..
bt in my heart..
i hide my frustrations..

den siuhou came..
he did nt sit da place reserved for him..
in fact..
he sat beside me..
kinda touched..
den suddenly sum1 said sumthin dat make me very angry..
"y u dun sit at da seat de?"
SH!T la..
self dun wan acc me..
now he come acc me..
cannot a??
F away la!!
damn u!

den jux finiz tuition in frustration.
din bother them at all..
dun even wanna c dem!

den bek home..
ntg much..
even i saw her on9..
i dun feel lik finding anymore..
@@

i hav a lot of things wanna share v u guys..
bt dese 2 days rly prove to me a lot..
so i'll jux keep it to myself..
2 u guys..
im NTG!

i dun belong here..
i hate being alone..
bt no choice..
i hav to..
all i hope now is to graduate from here..
or die ASAP!!
ARGH!!
dun wan to see things lik dis anymore!!

144th day of waiting

144th day of waiting..Wed
morning..
keep read sj..
try try try~
den dey all..
come in oso same reaction..
who gt string..
haha..
cuz today wan return spbt books..
ish..
so faz return..
monday exam hw??
pjk n sivik oso..
who will buy reference book??

den suan..
2day go up stage v siew wei..
omg..
2day awkwardly noisy..
nvm..
den go bilik pengawas jor..
while w8in dem return..
den suan liao..
go out w8..
den very jia de..
haha..
den finally return jor..
went bek bilik..
w8 w8 w8..
den suddenly teac ask us carry things to bengkel@@
nvm..
after dat..
went bek class..
read sj..
n disturb meisim oso..

exam~
omg..
easy is easy..
bt hor..
i 4gt jor~
so conclusion..
hard for me..
easy for others..
T.T

finally finiz~
exam "over"!!
(excluded PJK n PSK)
!!!!
haha~
rly wonder..
if whole class "summer..summer.. summer"!!
hoho..
sure very yeng de..
bt..
haha..
den over lo..
go recess~
drank sarsi~

den went bek 1st..
cuz wanna find pn lee..
bt cant find..
den go bek..
no1 dere yet..
den jux go 4I~
feeling mcm cant fit in oso..
fine..
decided to go bek..
when go bek..
dey all playing cards..
fine..
suddenly gt a kind of bu shuang..
dunno y la..
bt cant blame dem..
im da 1 who was lost 1st..
den jux..
stand at my seat..
tidy up stuff..
bt neither 1 of them offered me to play..
den suddenly sumthin strike my mind..
GO FIND PN LEE!!
giving me an excuse to leave..
den finally find dou jor..
den gt her no.
bt she busy..
fine..
den leave..
slowly walk bek up..
cuz dunno hw face dem..
den bek jor..
put jor things in my bag..
den 1 more thing strike my mind..
TOILET!
giving me another excuse to leave..
den slowly i go down n up..
while walking..
thought of a lot of things..
feeling dat im lonely here..
with problems in my mind..
feeling lik finding sum1 to talk v..
bt den..
i felt dat..
dere's no1 dat i can talk to..
here..
im alone..
alone..
alone..

bek jor..
find yenji dem..
jux chat even though dose topic tak berkaitan v me..
den c khaichee de book..
saw many of dem..
haha..
cute~
den chat chat chat..
suddenly our territory kena conquered by other ppl..
den jux go find yh chat lo..
omg..
my tie pin kena humiliated..
he clip his pen*s with my clip..
omg..
den weii came..
he still open up his zip ask gt fur anot..
omg..
haha!
even though kinda weird..
bt at least im happy..
cuz at least sum1 can acc me..

den keep go dedikasi c haslina mark paper..
omg..
my chemistry damn afraid ei..
she haven't mark..
T.T
den keep walk here n dere..
den talked to weihao for da 1st time..
haha..
he oso quite 'lonely'..
reading his book dere..

i kept walking here n dere..
talking to 'lonely ppl'..
haha~
at least can keep me occupied..

den b4 bek..
pn lee found me..
den haiz..
rly hope u can be our teac-in-charge..
u're the best!

den bek home..
since faced things dat i dun lik in skul..
so kinda no mood..
den slept around 6 to 10..
woke up..
dad n mom went genting..
i jux on9 till 4 sumthin..
den sleep..

finally saw our dancing vid..
kinda satisfy..
reminds me of da times we've been thru..

sumhow..
here..
i'm alone..
hate dat feeling..
bt no choice..
hav to face it..

141st, 142nd, 143rd day of waiting

141st day of waiting..Sun
morning woke up..
den prepare go tuition..
ntg much..
den bek..
damn hungry..
still wan fetch grandpa dem..
skip~
nite keep revise bio2..
haiz..

142nd day of waiting..Mon
go skul..
prepare for assembly..
dis time no event..
so tot can be faster..
den jux w8 for speech..
getting longer n longer..
say we shudn't waste time..
study more..
bt now..
ish==

den finally over..
still hav 1 hour^^
bt hor..
my dream let a teac spoil jor..
she wan all ppl to sing n ikrar agn..
damn..
my time to do revision..
gone!!
den chem 1..
shit!
no bring OMR n testpads..
borrow~
or shud i say ask dem return bek..
XD
chem..
at least still can choose..
nt too bad..
den while doing..
suddenly feel dou sumthin behind me..
omg!
is my bag..
deng!
no bring out dou..
keep blocking it from teac's sight..

den recess n bio2!!
not much time..
TT
den exam..
sum still managable..
shit!
lipids..
no read dou!!
TT
14 marks go bye bye..
damn sad..
bt haiz..
at least essay still can simply rite..
gt a lil idea..

den bek home..
nap..
den study for bio1 n addmath..
no go tuition..
ponteng agn..
2nd time jor..@@

den while reading bio.
chatting v sum1..
listening to "enchanted"..
suddenly..
hav da urge to cry..
den cant control..
rly cried out..
so switched off da lights..
went to bed..
n cried whole night..
i rly miss da times we've been together..
i rly wanna be with u..
bt..
i noe we r impossible..
u will nvr like me anymore..
im trying to change..
bt guess dat i will nvr win him..
i wont be as gud as him..
..

143rd day of waiting..Tue
omg..
bilik pengawas..
became so small..
bt very tidy..
lik a canteen..
dunno y even though very dislike..
bt feel ok abt it..
mayb cuz tidy..
n can c dou da prefects kinda united..
^^
den exam..
addmath 2..
omg..
sum questions cacat de..
skip dem~
since choose only few to answer de..
luckily still can..
den bio1..
oso..
many dunno de..
teac still say easy==
den slept for 10 min..
automatically woke up..
den check..
den pass up..
finally laz 3rd sub jor..
SJ!!

den afternoon chat v sailou..
make me think dou after SPM wan hw change..
maybe bcum very wild..
maybe not..

den tuition..
teac very very late only come...
help sy erase da things on her sj book..
damn many de lo..

den bek home..

...

getting bad tempered lately..
gt many things..
suddenly feel lik shud be kept in heart..
cuz saying out will only let ppl think is a joke..

all i wanted is jux a simple thing..
bt..
ARGH!!!
y m i being so bad tempered!!
lil things oso become so angry..

do i rly mean wad i said??
dun think so..
perhaps..
i shud only hide my feelings to myself..
no1 wud even care abt it..
blogging will be my only way to release all my stress..
perhaps dis will be da only way..
even though i noe no1 wud care..
all i can say is fine...