boredom~

at home dunno do wad..
lazyness is still striking me..
zzz

haiz..
2day..
dunno wad 2 say..
erm..
start from going to skul..
brought camer along..
XD
bt din play v it..
since is for serious matter..
(ok.. is only for pm project)

den gt dunno wad majlis..
din rly bother bout it..
bt sumthin about drugs..
ceramah~
din bother it..
den go bek to class..
cant find moral teac..
so decided to keep da camera by myself..

den sivik..
teac din teach..==
den pj..
changed into pj shirt n went for pingpong..
as usual..
waiting for my turn~
den dis is when my mood let ppl spoil it..
ever heard of queuing??
no~~
not 1 person..
2 oso..
it was my turn..
i may not be dat gud..
bt i deserve a try..
no~~
jux cut my line..
fine..
i giv u..
i dun wan to show faces..
bt i rly hate it..
ask urself..
if u r da 1 who were waiting..
den suddenly sum1 cut da queue..
i noe u surely scold n show faces..
FINE~
giv u..
at most cannot play only..
i wun lose anything..
bt guess wad..
whether u care anot..
u lost sumthing..
maybe u dun bother..
bt u lost it..

den when is another turn..
going to reach my turn..
WTF!!
teac ask me to do sumthin..
omg..
say im more responsible..
wan me to do..
==
apalah..
rly omg..
look on da bright side..
teac look up on me..
bt..
nvm..
past~

all i can say is..
from now on..
i wun tolerate anymore..
nt to u guys..
n..
i dun wan to go dere anymore..
waste my time..

den after PJ..
everything back to normal..
class~~

during physics..
when teac let us go..
wengkuat put da chair on da table(lab)..
den put till nt stable..
da chair fell..
i noticed dat..
afraid dat it'll make noise..
so i use my hand to stop it..
end up..
da chair hit on my hand..
hurt!!
till cant rly giv out power..
like no energy..
TT

den finally end of school..
went down to da 'taman' to do some kerja amal..
bt i feel kinda fake haha..
nt much rubbish oso let us make till more rubbish..
bt is jux for reference..
we did a lot of kerja amal...
bt no pictures only..
so is fair..
haha..
bt da pic some cant see face..
so dunno teacher accept anot..

den after school..
nap..
tuition..
den bek..
den i saw some1's blog..
rly..
1 word..
wannabe~
think dat u're cool or wadeva..
same word for u~
wannabe~~
dunno how den simply do..
end up??
haha
rly funny..
u guys r jux making a fool of urselves..
cant stop laughing..
XDXD

still complicated..
awaits..
4 days more..

Unbelievable..

My goodness..
today rly..
i din expect it..
both kailin n yingxin din come today..
nt sure y..
bt i think is cuz dey slept late..
since nid to pray..
bt wad oso din inform..
2day suddenly say we nid to go ikrar..
omg..
wad oso din prepare..
den we quickly prepare..
write da ikrar on a piece of paper..
den omg..
legs shaking..
den..
when asking da prefects to go duty..
i shouted..
bt my voice..
dunno y sounds so weird..
haven 'open' yet..
i think..
sounds weird..

den go out le..
omg..
more n more nervous..
bt lucky..
ntg went wrong..
haha..
end up..
feel very 'high'..
bt still nervous..
omg..
haha...
2day din feel bad..
kinda happy..
haha..
bt my heart is still complicated..
do i??
or do i not??
i rly dunno..

awaits..
6 more days..

3rd post of da day..

haiz..
dunno wad to say..
jux looked back at my previous blog(wretch)..
omg..
cant bliv i noe how to use some words..
even now i oso dun rmb..
reminded me of many sad things..
bt till now..
i still haven solve most of it..
some i've forgotten..
bt some..
still in my heart..
2 years..
le..
haven bt going..
1-3-2010..
dats da day..
i dunno how will it happen..
bt i hope it works..
for once..
even is a 0.0000001% chance..

frenz..
i still cant figure it out..
maybe dats me..
my fate..
or my attitude??
i think is both..
for no reason..
i dunno y..
i dun lik it when u interfere my relationships..
with fren i mean..
i dun lik it when u noe my frenz..
perhaps im jealous..
jealous dat u hav more frenz den me..
perhaps..
maybe cuz of dat..
i dun lik it..
whenever u meet my fren..
my relationshp v dem will reduce..
i dunno how..
i hate my selfish thinking..
cant i be more 'open'..
think outside da box?
y cant i jux control my emotions..
bt no matter how..
is deir choice of choosing frens..
i cant control so much..
i will control myself..
dun be so sensitive..
frenz r still frenz..
forever..

till now i still cant 4gt abt wad happen 2 years ago..
i rly do miss dat day..
da day wher u said u liked me..
will it happen agn..??
dun think so..
it will be in my memory..
wad can i do..
how??
complicated now..
in da middle of da nite..
me..
typing dese rubbish..
dunno for wad..

2.51am..

CNY schedule~

eve..
went for dinner..
sang a lot of songS..
nt me bt my family..
my voice still nt suitable to sing..
TT

day1..
went to uncles(dad's bro)'s hse..
ate kfc for lunch(our tradition)
den bek to da hse...
play chodaidi using mahjong cubes..
cool ei~
bt lost money..
den had dinner dere..
nice~

day 2..
went dad's boss hse..
ate breakfast dere..
which is ok~
bt i miss da food laz 2 years ago..
mee siam n many more..
now all catering..TT
bt da sate nt bad..
XD
den saw da lion dance..
which took a loooooooooooooong time..
no pics..==
sat at da living room heard da drums..
omg..
sooooo long..
hurt la~
den went to grandma's hse..
since mum n dad hav dinner tonite..
brought my laptop along..
play at grandma's~
gt wifi~
hehe..
dere were many aunties n uncles dere..
ntg much..
den at nite..
played black jack with rick~
din win din lose..
thx 2 da last round..
or else i'll lose..

day 3..
went sy's hse..
many pics bt lazy upload..
ntg special..
jux ate many tibbits..
den won some money..
ppl keep saying me lucky~
haha..
hope so..
bt i din win as much as kk..
i jux won 20 i guess..
nite go auntie(grandma's sis)'s hse..
ate dinner..
played with my 2 cousins..
which is still kinda small..
bt cute~
da younger 1 cuter..
haha
da elder 1 kinda notty..
==
haha

day4..
went dad's frens hse..
omg da fried chicken rly nice..
me n bro keep eating..
omg..
i think our chic. bones is da most on dat table..
den gambled..
won a few..
nice..
da dealer..
nt in gud condition..
dere were 2 gals..
maybe too rich..
dunno how save money..
very....
OMG
indescribable..
no go dou jy's hse tim~
nvm la..
next year..

day 5..
went jusco..
intended to watch 72sumthin..
bt full..
ended up watch "Percy Jackson-The Lighting Theif"..
NICE!!!
for me who was interested in greek myths..
lagi nice!!
gt connection with greek myths..
my favourite..
rly no regrets..
bt for dose who dunno anything about greek myths..
u wun understand da beginning bt it will oso b nice..
nice movie!!
like it!!
after movie..
had dinner with auntie n grandma..
omg..
ordered too much food..
bt still managed to finish le..
bt still gt few piece of chicken..
total 500++
speechless..

day 6..
stomachache..
missed all da fun at xh's hse..
argh..
y so..
ish~
TT
bt chatted with jn while doing sejarah..
for 4 hours..
omg..
i very 8 xia..
hahaha

day 7
lagi bored..
lik normal saturdays..
go organ lesson..
den tuition bio..
ntg much..

day 8
ntg much happen yet..
typing dese blogs in da middle of d nite..
2.41am~

败妹所赐（crazy tagging^^)

规则:


一，被点者请在自己的网志上打上答案
二，请传给另外十个人
三，传阅人请在这十位被点的人的留言板上通知他，他被点咯!
四，这当中的十位不得拒绝
五，被点者请注明被谁点了在哪里接到再传给下十位
六，这些被点名者，你们被点会祝福
七，不可回点哦，并且愿望会实现和得到幸福 坐上幸福热气球，开始咯~

幸福热气球：第一阶段
1.绰号: PsyCho
2.星座： Gemini
3.生日：7 Jun
4.兴趣：no idea
5.血型:B
6.最宝贵的东西：no idea oso..
7.最讨厌的东西： lizard??

幸福热气球：第二阶段
1.有喜欢的人吗: yea~
2.有交往吗：nope
3.幸福吗：dun think so
4.他很爱你吗：probably no
5.如果你有勇气最想做什么：propose agn.. face to face

幸福热气球：第三阶段
1.你被谁点：jiahxin
2.他是你的谁： "sister"
3.他的个性是： pessimistic i guess.. bt nt rly..XD
4.他长得怎样： cute?
5.跟他认识多久： 1 year
6.你想跟他说什么：jiayou in everything
7.如果他变成你的情人：erm.. no idea..

幸福热气球：第四阶段
1.最爱的音乐：eng songs..
2.最爱的季节： in malaysia.. rainy days??
3.最爱的卡通：many.. muahahaXD
4.最爱的颜色：BLACK
5.最想去的国家： anywhere cool i guess
6.最爱的水果：neither.. maybe sweet mango~
7.最爱的饮料：tea?
8.最爱的人： family n frenz..

幸福热气球：第五阶段
1.你很爱哭吗：kinda..
2.你很爱笑吗：oso kinda..
3.你是很有信心的人吗： not at all
4.你想要怎样的生活： nice n happy
5.你喜欢自己吗：not really..
6.你喜欢音乐吗：yea
7.你喜欢体育吗：no
8.你喜欢跳舞吗：not rly..
9.你很专情吗：maybe..XD
10.你喜欢睡觉吗：yea..
11.你喜欢唱歌吗：yea..

幸福热气球：第六阶段
1. A
2. B
3. C
4. D
5. E
6. F
7. G
8. H
9. I
10. J

[五号跟谁谈恋爱]:no1
[一号是男的还是女的]：neither
[六号人很好吗]: dunno
[二号很色吗]:maybe..
[七号跟三号在一起吗]：yea
[八号是单身吗]：yea
[你会追求四号吗]： no
[十号喜欢一号吗]： not at all..
[五号读那间学校]：alphabetic school
[六号喜欢谁]: FISH
[二号喜欢唱歌吗]：no
[你爱七号吗]：no
[三号住哪]： ABC book~
[十号跟你告白]： impossible
[四号有宠物吗]：a dog..

(CRAZY dy!! dun wan tag ppl.. haha)

如果你有三个愿望 ,Tell me your wish :
1. score well in exam
2. be handsome XD
3. healthy

HAPPY CNY & Valentines~

I hereby wish every blog readers happy chinese new year & valentines day!!
n of cuz my frenz la...

haiz..
dese days gt many things to fan..
haiz..
disappointed..
many things..
1..
sum1 broke his promise..
now he finally managed to resign..
happy now?!
i put my trust in u..
bt u let me down..
fine..
u happy den suan liao..

2..
for no reason..
i felt disappointed when i noe........
bt..
dun wan to say much..
i noe im nt handsome at all..
bt it is kinda hurt too..
fine..
nobody will cares..
especially when im nt handsome..
who would even wanna care..
i understand..
i wun go n bother u anymore..
y shud i care so much for da afternoon session anyway..
dey dun even care..
jaga sendiri dululah!!
sendiri pun belum jaga dgn baik..
skrg mau jaga org lain..
mengapa mau sangat 8??!!

3..
frenz...
sumhow..
i rly hav problems in relationships..
when u think u r bez fren..
bt dey jux wun care..
laz time i noe who to tell abt my problems..
now i hav no1 to tell..
every1 i find seems bz..
or got annoyed by me..
perhaps dat's y..
once bez fren..
now..
hardly even talk..
who can i tell my problems..
can any1 tell me..
who is willing to listen..
who??!!
can any1 tell??

CNY..
i shud 4gt bout it..
4gt bout all da bad things..
bt can i??
haiz..

2day 1st day of CNY..
went uncle's hse(dad's bro)...
played chodaidi using mahjong..
quite new n weird..
bt din win TT
nvm..
2molo will de!!
haha..

awaits for the day to come..
1-3-2010
my memorable day..

That Was Embarassing..

I cant stand it..
it jux came out on its own..
i cant stop it..
smthin bad muz happen when im starting to be happy..

my day starts at 6:15..
as usual..
go school..
bla bla bla..
pj period..
haiz..
hav to w8 for dem to finish playing..
only can play..
suan le..
i dun wan 2 comment bout dis..

den b4 recess..
annie was shouting angrily..
from wad i heard sum ppl say..
"DRAMA"
rly let da teac zd..
btw..
annie,
if u think u r innocent..
dun bother dem..
since dey dun trust u..
den fine~
anyway..
is nt my business..
dun wanna be so bzbody..
happy oways~

den when prefect's turn to recess..
walk down with dem..
bt when i wanna talk..
nobody listens..
dey continue with deir topic..
den i stopped walking..
bt dey din bother..
fine..
i noe when dey hav each other..
im nt important to dem anymore..
dun wanna make myself look lik a fool..
fine..
i go back up..
bt from wad i expected..
nobody cares..
except for yan tong..
at least she asked abt me..=]
...
frenz..
dis r frenz..
i cant do much..
i cant force ppl to talk to me..
i cant force ppl to like me..
so no choice..
be alone lo..

den during recess..
saw physics teac..
YES!!
since i lost my ticker tape..
i told teac da truth..
since she's kind..
she 4gav..
so happy..
no nid die le..
haha..
jux when im happy..
sumthin bring me down..

after duty..
went back to class..
den only i rmb dat pn nora asked us to go to da library..
den quickly i shouted to da class 2 go down..
bt nobody listened..
fine..
went down myself..
den when found teac..
teac started scolding dose who came down 1st..
even though wengkeat n yoke han went earlier..
im consider late..
bt i did my bez..
den teac started shouting..
scolding us..
i rly feel bad..
no..
im nt blaming on da teac..
is normal for her to scold..
is logic for her to be angry..
i dunno who m i blaming..
i jux feel nt appreciated..
for wad i've given..
frenz..
teachers..
nobody seems to care..
den when teac let us sit after scolding..
i lay down..
den till teac went..
i lay down agn..
feeling bad..
den see tho started asking me nt to be sad..
den all dose words make me cried..
==
dat was embarassing..
is all her fault!!
kidding..XD
i noe dose r words of encouraging..
bt dose words made me cry..
bt i noe she cared abt me..
so stil gonna say thx..

i cry nt bcuz of teac scold me..
2 be exact is us nt me..
maybe a lil..
bt i dun hav mood already since recess..
so accumulate..
end up cant tahan..
dis time kinda serious..
cry till cant stop..
many ppl in class noe dy..
(still embarassing)==
bt jux cant control..
i tried my bez to please every1..
bt no..
everyone seems nt to care..
wad i given is nt appreciated..
dat rly hurts..

bt after skul..
feel better..
went for rumah sukan..
omg..
200m..
only 1 step to get da marks for da house..
1 more step den da teac blew da whistle..
haiz..
fate..
den after dat walk bek skul..
rly tired..
den during tuition(physics)..
rly slept for a while..
sry teac..
nt i dun wan concentrate..
bt im rly tired..


jux hope i can live better..
get appreciated..

...

Enough is enough..

im tired of my childishness..
im tired of my sensitivity..
im tired of everything i m..
i wanna change..
i wan to be sum1 i dunno..
i dun wan to be lik dis anymore..
i dun wan to talk so much to draw attention..
i dun wan to hate sum1 anymore..
all i wan is peace..
y can ppl dun bother abt it...
y cant i..
i muz try to do it..
muz..

so wad if no1 appreciate it..
as long i noe i did my bez..
i can be happy oredi..
is MUZ.

from dis day onwards..
i will talk less..
y talk so many..?
ppl won listen..
den i will start to feel angry agn..
so y shud i talk so much..
jux sit n listen..
done..
every1 happy^^

Failure..

Once again I'm a failure..

2day we hv merentas desa activity..
da prefects sold pizza..
i helped bt i dunno wad i did..
conclusion.. stand dere n pose only..

bt c all of dem kinda bz...
haiz.. ntg much to decribe about it..
den finiz school..
still ntg much special happened..
congratz yantong(2nd place) n 'sailou'(4th place)..
den after skul go for organ lesson..
ntg special..
jux tired..

den go for tuition lo after lesson..
omg..
stuck in trafic..
goin to be late..
haiz..
den 3.30 le..
haven reach..
den my phone vibrate..
wow..
tot my 'frenz' ask abt me..
bt no..
is my sailou dt ask abt me..
nvm..
nt important..

den reach le..
late bout 5-10 minutes..
nt too late la..
teac haven start teaching yet..
sit dere lo with my 'frenz'..
wad rly frustrates me is..
my present is no difference with my absent..
sitting dere means ntg at all..
is lik sitting alone..
nvr even ask y im late(since im usually early)..
din even bother..
fine..
when i finally gt a chance to go sit v my sailou..
haha..
nice..
feel much happier..
n most importantly..
i can see da board clearer..
nice~
bt it still bugs me..
is lik i rly mean ntg to dem anymore..
wadeva..
i noe who r da 1 who rly appreciate me..
who r not..

im such a failure..
i can nvr success in friendship..
ever since during primry skul..
all cuz of my high sensitivity..
i gt sensitive abt everything..
too sensitive..
bt i cant change it..
is me..
bt i tried to hide it..
so dat it won be dat bad..
i noe da problem is caused by me..
all bcuz im sensitive..
y go n bother so much..
bother this bother that..
end up??
hating dis hating dat..
self feeling frustrated..
stupid me..
for all im facing..
i can blame no1..
all i can blame is myself..
i deserve no1 to care..
i deserve nothing..

!!!MJ!!!

U R SUCH A FAILURE!!!

SUCH STUPID!!!

!!!!I HATE U!!!!

i wan be sejarah teacher!!

u guys be thinking dat im crazy...
bt no..
is so EASY..
"go home read dis..dat.."
"i dun wan tech so detail or else i cant finiz da syllabus"
"i wan noe da meaning of ... next week.."
done..
i finiz teaching..
so easy><
i learn dis from my RESPECTED teacher.. XD

den dis morning..
dunno y my class n 4D gt ppl 'destroy'..
kena vandalised..
den run up n down..
finally settled bt dunno who did it..

y..
frenz..
love..
how..
it cant balance at all..
after seeing HIS blog..
i feel..
very..
nt happy..
nt angry..
nt sad..
nt wadeva..
bt da feeling aint gud at all..
y..
u said u dun lik her anymore..
u said u lik another person..
now u're saying dat u lik bek dis person..
i rly speechless..
i noe i dun hav da chance anymore..
bt..
i dunno wad to say..
i rly wanna..
dunno wad..
argh!!
frustrated..
y muz i suffer from dis..
y muz we coincidentally lik da same person..
u think i wun be jealous abt it??
all on a sudden..
u go find her..
u think i wun jealous??
she wan find teac..
den u oso wan follow..
u think i like it??
it rly hurts..
y..
y can i still act my smile..
muz i be so fake..
y cant i jux express out my feeling??
y shud i be so stupid..
i rly cant stand it..
standing behind u guys..
seeing wad u guys do..
u think i rly feel ntg??
perhaps i can jux smile..
u!!
look on d bright side..
u still hav a BFF supporting u..
appreciate it!!
me??
everything seems different when u r nt at da same primry skul..
im oways lik an outsider..
most ppl find me only bcuz dey cant find deir real fren..
so find me as substitute..
nvm..
everything will be over in 2 years time..
it may be long bt i muz stand it..

instincts tell me love will come over frenship agn..
AGN!!
u will hate me once agn..
jux w8 n c..

lastly..
dere's 1 fren who rly made me touched..
2day at class..
suddenly u came in n say wan find me when teac is teaching..
go out lo..
wow..
u gav me a bottle of eyedrop..
it rly means a lot..
compare to others..
u rly r a caring fren..
im rly rly touched..
nvr rly expect anything..
my own frenz..
nt even asking how m i..
bt u..
purposely giv me 1..
even though doc oredi gav me medicine..
n i cant use urs..
bt im rly rly touched of wad u did..
THANK YOU Leong Shu Nee!!
Friends Forever~~

why...

Love is in the air..
more n more couples in da school..
perhaps Cupid's arrow shot many ppl..
bt me..><

for no reason..
i jux cant giv up..
i cant stop loving u..
im jealous when i u with other guys..
rly...
bt i can ntg bout it..
u r only my fren..
i dun hav da right to ask u to leave dem..
i dun hav da right to be sad or angry about it..
im nt ur who..
i cant do anything..
i can jux think of other things to distract me from u..
y..
y is it so hard..
knowing dat he stil likes u make me more...
indescribable..
all i wan is jux an easy matter..
bt it seems so hard..
y..
i dun hav da looks..
i dun hav da things u r looking for..
perhaps..
perhaps wad i hav is wad u wanted laz time..
nt now..

wad can i do..
wad can i do to make me less obsess about it..
isit time to giv up?
bt whenever i say dat..
a thought jux come to me..
saying 'u gotta chance'..
dis encouragement is too harsh..
is making more..
ARGH~
i dunnno how..
can any1 tell me..

so what...

i c no difference between my present n absent..
nobody seems to care..
bt i noe some did..
thx ya all~~

haiz..
2day tot can play ping pong de..
bt..
haiz..
dun wan talk abt it..
bazir masa tukar baju..

a funny thing is..
when having meeting..
she suddenly ask me go out..
den praise me agn..
omg..
damn funny..
XDXD

sore eyes..

cuz of red eyes..(I m Terminator!!)XDXD
i din attend skul for 2 days..
bt no much ppl cares abt it..
so do i XD..
bt to those who cared...
i rly appreciate it..
it rly cheers me up a lot..
n most importantly..

i nid wish CheeYong n Yin-Xin
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
din attend da party..
><
haiz..
perhaps next time..
XD

i dun wan to get involved with so many things anymore..
if sumthin happens..
im being blamed..
bt even if im nt involved..
i will get blamed too..
haiz..
is hard to do..
i noe u won bliv me..
bt i tried my bez..
for wad descision had been made..
i hav no control of it..
trust me or not..
i cant force ya to..
bt as long in my heart,i'll say:
I'm innocent..

Speechless...

Again..
from wad i expected..
wad i had expected came true again..
(as always)
ever since dat day i started to forgive u...
i knew dat u will hate me agn..
forgiving is da starting for u to hate me..
i knew it all along..
we can nvr be frenz..
since..
ever..
is either u hate me or i hate u..
bt i choose to let u hate me..

maybe i hav again misunderstand..
bt i dun think so..
if u think i keep spreading wad u did..
den u r wrong..
i din spread it..
im da 1 who heard from other ppl..
did i mention wad u did on my blog??
did i say who did it on my blog..
ppl who asked me oredi knew wad happen..
so it aint my fault..
i even feel embarassed about it..
y would i tell other ppl..

if u insist im da 1 who harmed u..
fine..
bt i can say dat im innocent..
i didnt do anything dat harm any1..
instead i tried too beg for u..
which is impossible..
i know is hard for u to trust..
bt at least i know dat im innocent..
dun accuse me for doing ntg wrong..
i tried my bez..
bt his descisions r beyond my control..
wadeva..
i did anything dat i can do to help..
wadeva happens..
i can ntg bout it..

sumtimes i rly envy dat u can do everything dat i wan..
envy bt nt jealous..
seems lik u can do everything dat i wan..
y..
i rly cant tell..

conclusion:
i dun hate u..
bt i dunno whether u hate me anot..
if u do..
i apologize for wad i've done..
if u dun mind..
tell me..
bt u probably won..
so is a waste of time..
of cuz i rly hope we can be gud frenz..
better to hav a fren den an enemy rite??
no hard feelings??

i'll start to put down everything..
i dun wanna get involved in so much annoying things..
which do ntg bt hurt my feelings..
if im nt told..
i dun wanna do dose things anymore..
u guys can handle it by urselves..
with or without me is da same..

我讨厌
蛮不讲理的我

我讨厌
很敏感的我

我讨厌
小气的我

我讨厌
自以为是的我

我讨厌
自私的我

我讨厌
。。。。。。。